It’s Still Good to Be Queer

Over the past few years, I’ve learned to dread Pride, but I still love what got us here.

Trust me, you’re going to be real proud that I didn’t make a “Polyester Pride” pun. Photo by Patrick Robert Doyle on Unsplash

I used to be sad all Pride month. It had something to do with the idyllic life I imagined all queer people to be living: Out there, free, having figured out exactly who they were and what they needed, part of a community that understood and supported them, having sex that was (I was pretty sure) frequent and respectful and just personal-record-smashing levels of great every single time.

That’s what the queer people were doing, during Pride month, and then there was me, calling myself “straight” because I didn’t know what other word to use. Until I had an answer, it didn’t seem right to take up space. It’s not like I was really keeping any secrets. I was a weird person, and I had managed to build myself a life where everyone, romantic partners included, expected a certain level of weirdness from me. But it was a very private life, one that I shared only with people I could trust, and it was a life that did not have a lot of language.

Eventually, you find language. Eventually, weird can turn into queer. So, here I am, on my third Pride out of the closet, finally invited to the party. And now here I am, sad, again, on Pride month: Because Target can’t carry cheesy rainbow flags and trans pride T-shirts…